Be the Helpers

Approaching Trump 2.0 with a different mindset

Thank you for supporting CARD. Shout out to everyone who joined this month. We’ve more than quadrupled the number of paid subscribers since November 1, which is bonkers. This week, I’m taking a break from the resource lists I’ve compiled to discuss something more personal and, I think, timely right before the Thanksgiving holiday.

I plan to continue to offer more frequent content through March of next year. To help readers have all the information, resources, and analysis they need in preparation for the next Administration. Paid subscribers will receive some of these newsletters early, but everything will eventually be free for everyone to read. 

I’ll make this newsletter available to all on Tuesday. -M

There’s a meme that often goes around social media in times of national catastrophe and distress. Mr. Rogers reminding us to look for the helpers. It’s a good reminder for our children, so it’s no wonder that Mr. Rogers often said this throughout his career. But I find myself more and more uncomfortable each time it goes viral. 

For adults, look for the helpers is a dubious message. It’s passive, a way to pass the buck onto someone else. We saw this a lot during the last Trump Administration and Covid time. There was a lot of looking to others, from Bob Mueller to Liz Cheney, to come and save us. Conversely, we had a lot of deserved anger at those who had power and chose not to try to stop Trump. These people were supposed to be the helpers, but far too many of them didn’t show up when we needed them.

I fully expected to see the meme again after the election and have been pleased that it hasn’t. As I’ve had more conversations I’ve had with folks from people who work in politics or advocacy to people who are politically active, to people who didn’t vote for Trump but also wouldn’t consider themselves political, I think I understand why. People seem to grasp that no one is coming to save us. And the systems and institutions we’ve long clung to have fallen or are on the brink of doing so.

Interestingly, I also don’t feel the same helplessness and hopelessness. The word that repeatedly comes to mind is resolved. People have no illusions about what’s coming. They’re angry and grieving, but there’s no illusion that a hero will rise to save us from ourselves. My sense is that those of us who fought for democracy are going into this with our eyes wide open. That means different things to different people, but three big themes have come up repeatedly in my conversations:

Building community I’ve heard so much about the importance of organizing together but also gathering socially. Getting to know our neighbors or reconnecting with friends we’ve lost touch with. One friend told me the sense of isolation she’s felt since Covid hasn’t gone away and she doesn’t even know how to socialize any more but now she’s determined to try again. A colleague talked to me about reconnecting with volunteers from her first campaign to check in and all of the thoughtful conversations that resulted from those texts.

Showing up for one another This takes many forms, too. People have talked with me about mutual aid or showing up for friends and neighbors that the Trump Administration will target—about locally focused advocacy for their schools and libraries. And there are various ways those of us with a lot of privilege can wield it for the greater good. A few non-political people have asked me how to start getting involved. No one has talked to me about giving up or letting someone else handle things. Even if they don’t know what to do or need more time to grieve, they’re called to keep going. 

Cultivating Joy This is the one that hits closest to home for me. So many folks have mentioned joy as a practice. Something they plan to create in their lives during dark times. Last week, I wrote about how I’m determined not to let Trump’s constant need for attention disrupt my life anymore, but it’s bigger than that. MAGA thrives on our disconnection and misery. Cultivating joy and not allowing Trump and MAGA to rob us of our joy is a radical act of resistance. It’s also good for our well-being. 

I want to recognize that engaging isn’t easy right now for some people. Some of you live in deep red areas, and it’s hard to find your people, or you’re about to travel home for the holidays and engage with family members who are Trump supporters. What I can offer is you’re not alone, and other people are going through the same things, including some of your neighbors. Your community is out there, physically or virtually. Even if you don’t know it yet. 

This time around, things will be different. We’re empowering ourselves and one another, relying less on the gatekeepers and authority figures. We’ll win some fights and lose a lot of them. But along the way, we’ll deepen our relationships and forge new ones. 

We’re no longer looking for the helpers. We’re becoming the helpers.